political humor
« previous entry | next entry »
May. 4th, 2008 | 08:43 pm
location: home
mood:
tired
Looking for Work
A Japanese doctor said, 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.'
A German doctor said, 'That's nothing, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.'
A British doctor said, 'In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.'
A Texas doctor, not to be outdone said, 'You guys are way behind. We took a man with no brains out of Texas, put him in the White House, and now half the country is looking for work.'
A Japanese doctor said, 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.'
A German doctor said, 'That's nothing, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.'
A British doctor said, 'In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.'
A Texas doctor, not to be outdone said, 'You guys are way behind. We took a man with no brains out of Texas, put him in the White House, and now half the country is looking for work.'

(no subject)
from:
shibari
date: May. 5th, 2008 01:03 am (UTC)
Link
Reply | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 02:26 pm (UTC)
Link
Bushrepublican?Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
hoshi_nishimura
date: May. 5th, 2008 01:04 am (UTC)
Link
Reply | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 02:26 pm (UTC)
Link
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
chenka
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:47 am (UTC)
Link
Reply | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 02:27 pm (UTC)
Link
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
chenka
date: May. 5th, 2008 04:07 pm (UTC)
Link
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 04:39 pm (UTC)
Link
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
chenka
date: May. 5th, 2008 04:41 pm (UTC)
Link
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 02:50 pm (UTC)
Link
I won't vote for Hilary or Obama because I don't trust either of them. Hilary is a not someone I'd want running our country. And Obama there is just things about him I don't like. Oh and I'm not a democrat. I'm a republican and personally I don't really want McCain but what other choice do I have? I really would have liked Huckabee but yeah....
Sorry for being so...bitchy this morning. Don't take my comments like I'm dissing on you because as this is America we are entitled to our own opinions and beliefs ^_^ It shouldn't stop anyone from being friends though jah?
Reply | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 04:48 pm (UTC)
Link
R U kidding? LOLOLOLOL, I'm STILL making funnies at Bill Clinton and his dick swinging, pot smoking ways!! LOLOLOL And he's not even in office anymore! LMAO! Bill Clinton was fun to make fun of. The difference with with Bill, of course is that Bill will probably laugh along side you, lol.
and probably pass the bong tooHere's Bill in the waiting room to the interviews of hiring his next intern,
Bill "OK, now which of you ladies hasn't caught my herpes yet?"<--a joke from Family Guy. I couldn't find a clip at youtube or I would've posted it, LOL
And this one takes the cake,
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:21 pm (UTC)
Link
You know what's funny my dad says Bill would be a cool guy to hang out with but he doesn't trust him when it comes to politics (or your daughter around him LOL).
I'm not saying I'm against the jokes, just how people are always disrespecting the president, no matter who it is. And this has been the worst I've ever seen it. I mean yeah jokes about clinton and his "i didn't inhale" and stuff but people didn't seem to disrespect him, you know what I mean? Now I'm not saying Bush is great because he isn't he's fucked up but so have all the other presidents ^_^
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:37 pm (UTC)
Link
It is funny, I'm in kinda a similar canundrum (sp?) with my feelings about Bill. I think he did a great job running the country as president (we were in a budget surplus for the first time in years) but if I knew him personally, I probably wouldn't like him. I think he's probably a somewhat shady person as far as family goes. I mean he IS an adulterer. He broke a commandment. (of course, i dunno if he is even christian or not- seperation of church and state 'n all) He has a lot of answering to do as far as that's concerned. I don't think he needed to answer to the country about it though. When that happened, I think the government and the media wasted everyone's time with the hearings about that. That was between him and his family and that
skankintern-turned-author Monica Lewinsky.And yeah, I wouldn't want my daughter to intern for him either, lol.
"EWWWW even a naked cartoon bill is scary."
Do you watch Family Guy? They always have jokes about him on that show, I be laughing my ass off, lol. But Family Guy is pretty offensive to some people. They also have a lot of racial, and religious humor too. alot of the material is just really offensive...
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 06:11 pm (UTC)
Link
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:00 pm (UTC)
Link
But I'll be glad when Bush is gone for many other reasons. One of the biggest reasons is that I hope that our US soldiers will come home from Iraq. Another is that I really would like to see gas prices drop. Hillary has talked about sharing our concerns about that. She's also talked about standardized (is that the word?) healthcare so that everyone can get equal healthcare, and not just those who can afford it. And I know it's just talk and alot of polictians say what they know you wanna hear to get into office, but I'm still voting for Hillary. I don't think she'll be elected but I'm still voting for her.
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:26 pm (UTC)
Link
Gas prices have a lot to do with the damn oil companies and being so fucking greedy. They made billions of dollars this year but did our prices drop? Hell no. Again greedy ass mother fuckers (Sorry for the language LOL).
I'd like our troops to come home too but who knows if that will happen even if hilary or obama is in office. It's all talk right now, I want to see it happen. You know?
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:52 pm (UTC)
Link
Yeah, that's probably best, lol. They ARE politicians, lol. I don't trust completely anyway. It's a part of my nature I guess.
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 09:32 pm (UTC)
Link
Not to get off subject but my "best" friend ever since 2nd grade treated me like shit now that I look back on it. Whenever her more important friends were around I was a nothing, she would ignore me & treat me like general shit. (Like when we went to New York on a class trip...yeah.) Anyway then when she wanted someone to hang out with and no one was around except me then I was her best friend in the whole world. I mean yeah we got along and had good times but she didn't really treat me the way a friend should treat you. When we went to NY she totally ignored me and hung out with more important friends and pretty much left me to do things on my own. It wasn't all that fun of a trip because at that time I was painfully shy and didn't really have a lot of friends, so I just kinda didn't do much other than stay with the group.
Oh and we can't forget my abusive friend (who thought he was my boyfriend)....yeah not good. Normally friends don't bruise and burn you or do they mentally abuse you. Oh then he turned into a my stalker after I broke off the friendship due to his drug use...Yeah haven't had good luck with some friends >_<
Not that I'm trying to make anyone feel sorry for me or anything like that but I figured I might as well just say why I'm so untrusting. ^_^
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 6th, 2008 12:36 pm (UTC)
Link
Sounds like you've been jacked by people you called friends. I think everyone has either been there or will be there someday. I've been their before too. And I've had major trust issues due to certain events in my life. And not just with friends but with family too.
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:13 pm (UTC)
Link
Of course we're still friends! I'd never drop a friendship over a contrast in belief concerning politics. I have 2 good friends who both voted for Bush. (although one of them regrets that now) My friend Kristin even voted for him twice, >.>... lol.
Actually, this joke, I didn't write it myself (though I wish I had cuz it's funny). My friend David sent it to me in an email. And David voted for Bush, lol.
And if Hillary were to make it into office (which I doubt she will), there'll be jokes about her too. I don't have any but I imagine they'll probably be about her being a lesbian, or how can she lead she the country when her husband won't even follow her, etc... There may even be jokes about her being a woman like, what if she's having PMS? Do we really want someone with hormone driven mood swings and a cheating husband to have access to pressing any buttons that could launch our nuclear weapons? There might be jokes like that to come but even so, I think that policitians expect it...
And even though I don't like Bush, there have been times that I've respected him. For example, he's pro-life. I think that's wonderful, I really think that's a good quality and he stands by that, despite all the people's in the US that are pro-choice.
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:30 pm (UTC)
Link
It would get awful boring if all our friends were exactly the same as we are huh?! Oh by the way I'm also Pro-Life, poor little innocent babies getting slaughtered just because their "mom" doesn't want them >_< That makes me wanna cry now. Have you ever seen an aborted baby?? I ran across a photo of one one time and I almost threw up. It was sooo sad because you could see the little things hand, ribs and feet all mangled up with blood. I couldn't live with myself if I did that T_T
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
melissaluvzhyde
date: May. 5th, 2008 05:48 pm (UTC)
Link
"Sorry if Hilary makes it to office I'm moving to Japan."
LOL! I wanna move to japan regardless!
yes, i've seen aborted babies. I've also met many women that have had abortions. I would not do it either. when Bush signed that bill to outlaw 2nd and 3rd trimester abortions I was very happy about that. I dunno if it was ever passed though, guess I didn't stay tuned for the outcome. But I think life starts at conception. Even as a nurse, i never took part in the morning after pill either.One time a doctor tried to get me to get that for a patient and I had to tell her no. She wasn't happy with that but I just didn't feel comfortable giving to the patient. I would've told her, give it to the patient yourself but another nurse stepped in and gave it.
"It would get awful boring if all our friends were exactly the same as we are huh"
It's great to have stuff in common with, but yeah, if I only befriended people that shared my views on the world I might not have friends, lol! I gotta be open minded. Because with a closed mind I'd never learn anything in life, :)
Reply | Parent | Thread
(no subject)
from:
iceybabes
date: May. 5th, 2008 06:14 pm (UTC)
Link
Yeah I don't believe in the morning after pill either. I also believe life starts the instant the egg is fertilized by sperm.
Well I'm pretty open minded too! I'd probably have no friends too LOL
Reply | Parent | Thread